The Pleasure Principle: Create It for Yourself

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Date: Monday, November 30, 2009, 3:46 am
By: Tonya Pendleton, BlackAmericaWeb.com

Into each life a little rain must fall, but that also means that a little pleasure should, too.

Into each life a little rain must fall, but that also means that a little pleasure should, too.
For many women, in particular, pleasure is the last on a long to-do list of child-rearing, working, cooking, cleaning and caretaking. But without pleasure, you will shrivel up and die, even if you remain among the living.

We’re not just talking sexual pleasure here, either. If you have that going for you, that’s wonderful. But we’re talking about pleasure in all areas of your life, whether you have a romantic partner or not. In fact, it’s more important if you don’t! How would a man know how to treat you if you don’t know how to experience pleasure on your own?

So kick back for a moment, and consider how you can incorporate more pleasure into your life.

ENJOY NATURE. There are very few things in life more restorative than nature. If you can get to a park, a lake, a garden or even if you can sit by a tree on your lunch break, just being near nature can make you feel pleasure. Take a break, look at the sky if nothing else is available. Reflect on the glory of God and life's power and beauty, and count nature as one avenue to increasing pleasure in your life.

GET MANI/PEDIS. Winter, spring, summer or fall, it doesn’t matter. A regular manicure/pedicure is one of the most enjoyable things you can do for yourself. Just soaking your feet and painting your toes a cheerful color is pleasurable for most women. Even if you can’t afford to do it weekly, try to go as much as possible. If you’re the only person who’ll see your naked toes, enjoy them for yourself. They really should be a part of the Woman Contract. (Oh, you don’t know about that? Men sign them, too, but for regular barber visits.)

DATE YOURSELF. If you’re single, you can’t wait on a man to find pleasure in life. Find it for yourself. Take a mental health day if you can and spend it doing exactly what you find pleasurable. Get an ice cream cone. Eat chocolate. Go shopping, if you can afford to. Go window-shopping if you can’t. Head to the playground and get on the swings. The idea is to do for yourself what you might do on a date or just to have fun. The idea is to get away from the concept that pleasure must come from or via someone else. Find it in yourself.

BUY FRESH FLOWERS. No one brings you flowers? So what’s the problem? You can always buy them for yourself. There is definitely pleasure in a vase full of fresh flowers. If you can, buy yourself fresh flowers at least once a week. If budget is an issue, buy a single rose or find an inexpensive shop or flower wholesaler. A lot of grocery stores sell flowers these days – Trader Joe’s usually has them at good prices. Get a nice vase, and put the flowers in a prominent place. Smell them every time you walk by - and enjoy.

BUY AND WEAR LINGERIE, EVEN IF NO ONE SEES IT. Even if you work in the most conservative job in the nation, and there’s no one around to take it off you at night, buy some beautiful underwear. Don’t let being a full figure stop you, either. There are beautiful options for the curvy ladies out there. The point is lingerie can make you feel good and sexy, so wear it with enthusiasm. Take some pics in front of the mirror (but if you have kids, you .....